Your Dreams vs. Their Dreams

I am currently a senior in college, and recently have been trying to figure out what my “plans” are after I graduate. This is proving to be an ongoing inner struggle.

We are told from all over that now it is time to go find the right job or go to the right grad school so that eventually we can become the right person, and then we will be happy. What a load of bullshit.

Who said this was the road to happiness?

Your friend who is a lawyer?
Yeah, he will soon find out that he is not James Spader, and that life as a lawyer isn’t like the wonderful world of Boston Legal.

Your Parents?
They don’t know any better because it is all they have ever known. And, of course, they want to be able to tell all of their friends about their son “the ________”

Your friends?
They are all full of shit. Tell them about dedication and passion and they will gaze at you blankly. Tell them your dreams and they will laugh and say they are unattainable. This is good. It means you are alive and they are not.

You want to live---but do you know how to live? You are scared of dying---and, tell me, is the kind of life you lead really any different than being dead?
-Senecca
Letters from a Stoic

I remember reading that quote three months ago and it truly inspired me. At that point in my life I had hit the bottom. I had been dealing with a tough breakup, struggling with what I was going to devote my life to, not going to class as often as I would have liked, and generally just being a bum. A true fight club moment. I knew what I wanted and what I could become, but I kept choosing wrong, choosing what was easy. Then it hit me---I am not living, I am not choosing life, I am living my life as if I were dead. That is meaningless.

After I came to grips with the fact that I was not happy with what I had become, I knew it was then time for me to change. To stop saying I will be good tomorrow and actually be good today. Next came about a week of self-pity and questioning the fairness of life. And Then, Just. Like. That. I was inspired. Inspired to educate myself, and inspired to be passionate about the process and not just the outcome.

I look around at my generation and can’t help but notice we are lost. All wanting to buy into a system that produces unhappiness. A system that bases fulfillment on ends and not means. This is unsustainable. How are you going to be happy working 90 hours a week on something you hate? The answer is---you can’t. Why not choose your dreams? Choose what everyone says you can’t accomplish. Then…prove them wrong. Show them that your passion and dedication are what drive you and that you are alive. That your life is worth more than a fucking memo, or a corporate retreat.

Once you choose your dreams no one will understand you. THAT DOES NOT MATTER. You, alone, know your personal legend, and, you, alone, will know what it takes to get there. Let others put you down for things they are too afraid to do. Do not get caught up in the bullshit. Just know that you are living out your destiny and they are on the sidelines watching life pass them by. They are threatened and you are happy. And that is all that matters.